An Idiot's Guide to the Bill of Rights-Amendment One

It has come to my attention that there are an increasing number of morons that DO NOT understand our Constitution and the Bill of Rights, so I am here with an elementary primer to clear up the confusion. This ain't rocket surgery, Lester.

Amendment Number One: Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances.

Okay, Punkin', this should be simple, but for most this is one of the most complicated pieces of legislation ever passed. I'll break it down for y'all.

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion...This means that Congress shall NOT draft any legislation that establishes a religion. This does NOT mean that every State legislative body cannot do just that. If California wants to pass laws that say only Wiccans can live in California, the United States Congress cannot and must not interfere.

or prohibiting the free exercise thereof...Congress cannot tell the States that they have to do away with any religious symbols on the courthouse lawn. The Supreme Court has increasingly trampled on this Right in cases lately, but Congress has the Constituional duty to smack the Supremes down on this issue.

or abridging the freedom of speech...Congress cannot pass any legislation telling individuals what they can and cannot say. There have been a couple of attachments to this and explanations but, Congress has no power to stifle what people say, no matter how stupid.

or of the press...This is a little tricky, but nevertheless simplistic in its complexity. If you are the press, Congress cannot regulate what you have to say. There are other recourses to follow if you have been abused by the press, but Congress is NOT one of those.

or the right of the people peaceably to assemble...The key word here to me is "peaceably". Cindy Sheehan did not follow the peaceably description, so in my mind, it was cool for the policemen to release the hounds. Moonbats rarely "peaceably" assemble, they are violent and should be stopped.

and to petition the government for a redress of grievances...Simply put, the people are able to go to their government and say, "Dammit, boy, you done screwed up big-time!" And then start the proceeding to have all Democrats tied to lampposts and flogged.

I hope that this has cleared up any confusion regarding the First Amendment. Tomorrow, I shall drag out the cluebat for all the Sara Bradys in the country. Stay tuned for more from your One Stop Shop of Information.

UPDATE: It seems that I have been somewhat remiss in adding to this post. In Lemon v. Kurtzman in 1971, the Supremes kinda watered down the First Amendment in regards to State's Rights. Wikipedia has some stuff HERE. It seems that the Supremes took it upon themselves to dictate from the bench.