Dammit, We Gotta Elect Another President?

Man, it has just popped up on my radar that the United States of the America is about to elect another damn President next year. And looking at the humongous list of candidates, there is not one that I would like to sit down with to drink a beer. Yes, surprisingly enough, that is my single criteria for electing any official.

Here's who we have:

The Dumbasses:
Joe Biden, U.S. Senator from Delaware
Hillary Clinton, U.S. Senator from New York, Former First Lady, and professional LIAR!
Christopher Dodd, U.S. Senator from Connecticut
John Edwards, Former U.S. Senator from North Carolina and 2004 Loser
Mike Gravel, Former U.S. Senator from Alaska
Dennis Kucinich, U.S. Representative from Ohio
Barack Obama, Junior U.S. Senator from Illinois. Real name, Barry and from slave owning family. Yea, he's only half Black.
Bill Richardson, Governor of New Mexico and ex-Clinton apologist/lackey

and maybe: General Wesley Clark, Al Gore said no, but that means maybe.

and The Retards:
Sam Brownback, U.S. Senator from Kansas
John Cox, Illinois businessman
Jim Gilmore, Former Governor of Virginia
Rudy Giuliani, Former Mayor of New York
Mike Huckabee, Former Governor of Arkansas
Duncan Hunter, U.S. Representative from California
John McCain, U.S. Senator from Arizona
Ron Paul, U.S. Representative from Texas
Mitt Romney, Former Governor of Massachusetts
Tom Tancredo, U.S. Representative from Colorado
Fred Thompson, Former U.S. Senator from Tennessee
Tommy Thompson, Former Governor of Wisconsin

and maybe: Newt Gingrich and Chuck Hagel

Man, this is a tough one. Can we not just choose none of the above?

Okay, let's look at 'em. Of the D's, there is not one intelligent one in the bunch. If you are going to be a far-left Liberal, why can't you at least have a little bit of sense about you. Remember Daniel Patrick Moynihan? He was damn near a Socialist, but at least he could string together coherent thoughts. Not so with this string of losers.

Of the R's, I probably side the most with Duncan Hunter, but get real. Not one person knows who he is, including his constituents. They vote for him because he is the incumbent. Maybe Fred Thompson? Right. Same problem as Duncan Hunter unless you count the fact that he is an actor. Oooooooo, remember Hunt for Red October? Yea, but you remember Alec Baldwin in it.

The candidates that are in bold are the only ones that I can see that have a slim chance to win. Man, I hate people.