Stoned on Thera-Flu Blogging - A Scientific Study

I had a scratchy, little annoying cough today so I inhaled an entire Thermos full of Thera-Flu. Seriously, I had no idea what the Hell I was doing, but now I feel as if my skin were covered in frozen almonds that are alive. Well, that started a few minutes after I woke up face down in my living room with my pants around my ankles and all of my furniture had been moved around.

Did I mention that I wrote all over my body in red Sharpie? The writing appears to be some ancient glyph language, but dammit, it sure is beautiful. How long does it take indelible marker to wear off? Because most of it is on my face. Just another Saturday, I guess. Funny thing though, this hasn't happened since I stopped drinking a fifth a whiskey every day.

The only dream that I remember was about blowing up Texas Stadium and LO AND BEHOLD, it was not a dream.

I guess that blowing up the PAC-10 doesn't even have to done, because they suck. By the way, Andy is THIS MANY.

Not only that, I was FREEZING when I woke up and immediately performed a The Google search for global warming. Guess what I found? The only country on the entire planet that actually shows any warming in the entire time frame between 1995 and 2009 was Venezuela. Wonder why that is? Isn't that the Communist country run by Hugo Chavez, the guy who spoke so harshly about getting a bunch of money to fight Anthropomorphic Global Warming at that Gore-a-palooza concert in Buttholeville a coupla' weeks ago? Wow, no wonder he needs that money, his is the only real country that is suffering from AGW! Still more on the AGW FRAUD. It is the gift that keeps on giving!

I am certainly glad that we have a president that acknowledges the overwhelming dange that Muslims pose to the world. It only took him a week after the last terrorist attack to speak a few words about it. Oddly enough, his administration knew about the attack back in October. I am also glad that Barry is NOT RESTING until he finds that responsible, even while he is at the golf course in Hawaii. How hard is it to find someone that openly admits that they are responsible and does the guy that lit his nuts not have anything to do with the fact that he lit his own nuts? Sorry, I have never been a Muslim, so I have no idea how Barry thinks. Maybe he is CRAZY to go along with his STUPID.

Speaking of Obama, Damian G is getting ready to post the Douchebag of the Year awards. I still get a thrill up my leg that Damian used my suggestion of the residents of New Orleans in 2007. As if there would be a douchebag award that did not include the city of New Orleans.

Am I supposed to assume that THIS IS GOOD NEWS for the "universal healthcare" movement? Since dead people is what the Democrats want more of, I guess so.

Wonder how the federal government is going to pay MORE for all of those deadbeats that are failing to pay their mortgages?

Oh! Now, I see where that money is going to originate. How stupid of me. Remember, Obama is NOT going to raise taxes on anyone making more than 250k a year. "Read my lips. No. New. Taxes. I am just going to let the tax cuts EXPIRE."

Two words: Photo Bomb.

Anyhoo, here's a buddy of mine playing an original and NO! I did not pay him to wear the Paul Mitchell Design, LLC Logo-ed office uniform SMOCK.



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